This post may include affiliate links.
Have you got an idea that you’re waiting to start but something seems to stop you? There’s always something that needs to be done first. This whole confidence building jazz, the feel the fear but do it anyways, is starting to get in your way big time, and you don’t know how to stop it.
By the time you get to it, it becomes “why am I doing this”, “should I be doing this”, “who am I to be doing this”. We’ve fallen into the I’m-not-good-enough rabbit hole and we ain’t getting out!!
Everybody fears failure. Even the people the people getting out there worry about what people think & whether it will work!
This little gem is a great confidence building technique to get you past your negative self talk. And it only takes 5-seconds (win!!).
“You’re never going to feel like it” – Mel Robbins
First things first. To learn how confidence building & finding courage is to understand that we’re not always going to wake up motivated.
This is a big problem.
We wait to feel inspired, motivated or good enough.
Everytime I find myself procrastinating or saying “I just need to learn this”, I think of Tony Robbins. He constantly says that knowing something and doing something are two different things.
The whole self development loop is learning and learning but never doing.
Because when it comes down to it, if we don’t feel like it or don’t have the confidence to do it, we generally don’t.
Confidence building & courage is about doing it even when we don’t feel like it. Even when we feel like a fraud (which you’re not) and we are convinced we don’t deserve it. We have to do it. Action is how we put what we know to good use.
The 5 Second Rule
The The 5 Second Rule was created by Mel Robbins. I watched her TED talk and was blown away. Her honesty is a good kick in the butt.
This was the trick she used to get her out of her depression and anxiety.
All it is – which is “simple but not easy” as she says – is counting back from 5 right before you go to do something.
Mels biggest personal example was getting her out of bed during one of the hardest parts of her life.
When she woke up and felt the creeping thoughts of “I don’t want to get up yet”, she quickly counted backwards from 5 and jumped out of bed.
Now she travels the world talking about how this simple trick works in confidence building & finding courage.
I’m an early riser – but when it’s cold, there’s no better place than bed! So when I realised I had stuff to do and needed to get up I tried Mels trick. It worked!!
She does say it takes a while before this becomes a habit so if you’re not feeling it the first time, keep going!
Why does counting backwards work?
You might be wondering why counting backwards from 5 works.
Mel explains in her video the fancy science behind this 5 second hack.
So does it really take 5 seconds to change your life?
It distracts you from worries, it focuses your attention on what you need to do, it prompts you to act, and it interrupts the habits of hesitating, overthinking and holding yourself back
Before you know it you’ll find yourself counting backwards from 5, one hundred times a day as you push yourself to do all the things you don’t feel like doing.
It’s true when Mel says that the first 5 seconds of a thought is the hardest. It’s where most of our resistance and fears come to play. It’s amazing how many doubts can creep into our head in a few seconds.
You see, it’s not the big moves that define our lives; it’s the smallest ones.
5 – 4 – 3 – 2 -1
Where’s the next place in your life you can apply the 5-second rule?
The phone call that’s a bit too hard to make.
The post that’s waiting to get posted.
The conversation with your boss.